Friday, May 15, 2009

Where Was This Book

I just read a book entitled: “Well-Intentioned Dragons- Ministering to Problem People in the Church” by Marshall Shelly.

Book Synopsis:

Every Church has them - sincere, well meaning Christians who leave ulcers, strained relationships, and hard feelings in their wake. They don't intend to be difficult; they don't consciously plot destruction or breed discontent among the members. But they do often undermine the ministry of the church and make pastors question their calling. Well Intentioned Dragons guides those on church staff in facing the strenuous task of dealing with difficult people-even ministering while under attack. Based on real-life stories of battle scarred veterans, Marshall Shelly presents a clear picture of God's love for those on both side of the problem. He describes tested strategies to communicate that love and turn dissidents into disciples. Here is a book that will not only help pastors and church leaders preserve their sanity (and maybe their jobs); it will help them minister more effectively even to those who make life difficult.

Where was this book when I started to pastor?

Admittedly, when I started reading the book situations and people started coming to mind. But the more I read, I started to look at my participation in situations and how I could have done things differently.

This is my first pastorate and I acknowledge that I will make mistakes. No, I have made mistakes and will in time make many others. While I may have good interpersonal skills in my place of employment, being a pastor is a new challenge dealing with the many different personalities, personal agendas, traditions, long membership tenure, attitudes (“This is my church!”), power fights (“I’ve been on the BOD before your were born!”), spiritual immaturity, backbiting, gossip, doubt, attacks on leadership ability, and so many others. Having good interpersonal skills is not enough in the church. There’s a spiritual element that minimizes interpersonal skills to making a person fall on their knees in prayer. And trust me, I’ve prayed more now than ever before.

Turning dissidents into disciples is a hard task but not an impossible task. Look at the disciples that follow Jesus, if I may, well-intentioned dragons were in the midst such as Peter and Judas. Peter meant well but often times did or said something stupid. Judas followed Jesus but betrayed Him for some chump change. The story ending of Judas was a tragedy but Peter went on to be a great preacher.

I’ve been in church for a long time and seen a lot. Some of my experiences I don’t mind discussing and others I try to forget. But one thing is for sure, the church will have some well-intentioned dragons. They come in all shapes, forms, persons, ages, races, and genders.

I dare not try to offer suggestions on how to handle difficult people in the church because I have struggles that have not been proven yet in a resolution. However, I do encourage every pastor, preacher, lay leader, staff member, and deacon to get his book. It will benefit not only you but also your caring of members in the church.

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